Layla Martin is one of the best sex educators on the planet. Great information, super clever, and great video production. Her “How to Last Longer” in bed video gives you 6 things to think about in order to get you to the 45-minute mark. Layla says this is how long you have to last in most cases to give women a full-body orgasm through vaginal penetration.
I like this advice because it doesn’t even mention the “stop/start” method, widely regarded as the bread and butter therapy for premature ejaculation. See this link for more info:
http://www.risingmaster.com/the-start-and-stop-method-key-to-curing-premature-ejaculation/
The stop/start method is a great starting point for lasting longer, but the practices Layla recommends take training to last as long as you want to a much higher level. In particular, she talks about MOVING ENERGY OUT OF YOUR PENIS during sex. Once you’ve done the stop/start method, this is by far a more interesting and effective practice.
So, in this and the next five posts I’ll be giving more details about the 6 methods Layla talks about in her short video. Watch the video first, and then we’ll talk about the first practice of controlling your mental state…
https://www.layla-martin.com/2015/last-longer-in-bed/#more-3117
OK, let’s talk about Layla’s first point, Mental State. Many men have the idea that their ejaculations aren’t under their control. But like breathing, which happens automatically, or can be controlled through mental and physical activity, your ejaculations CAN BE CONTROLLED. That’s why you last longer sometimes, and ejaculate more quickly at others.
So it’s important to SET AN INTENTION to last longer, just as you might make up your mind to lose five pounds in the next month or go up ten pounds in your bench press in the next two weeks. You may have a system for achieving goals in other areas of your life such as visualizations, affirmations, etc. Do the same for lasting longer.
For example, after your morning mediation, or during your treadmill workout, close your eyes and vividly imagine yourself having complete control over your penis. Feel how you would feel thrusting in and out of your lover knowing you’re in control. How would that feel in your body? How would you be breathing? How would your erection feel? If you have a memory of a time when you did last longer than normal, put yourself back into that memory and feel what was going on in your body and what was going through your mind. The idea is to visualize it and FEEL IT IN YOUR BODY.
If you don’t have a memory like that, make up a fantasy where you are lasting as long as you want, and feel what that feels like. The point is to get your nervous system and your subconscious on-line with your new goal of lasting 45 minutes during intercourse.
An affirmation that will help would be something like, “I am now lasting 45 minutes during intercourse.” Find a time to write that sentence out three times each day. And when you first wake up, before getting out of bed, and when you go to bed, before going to sleep, say it to yourself, slowly, with CONVICTION, and again, feel the feeling of triumph in your body when you imagine attaining this level of control.
So, that’s it…in our goal to last for 45 minutes during intercourse, start by setting it as an intention. In terms of practices to get you to the 45 minute mark, start with the stop/start method if lasting longer than 15 minutes is a challenge (as it is for most men).
Next time: Using deep relaxation to get to 45 minutes…
Note: my e-mail program wasn’t syncing with my blog last week, and you may have gotten a weird-looking post with a bunch of code in it. If so, here’s the link to my interview with adult film star Keisha on her vaginal massage experience:
